Farfie's Barbie, I guess...
by Farfie sama
Summary: Uh....man I hate these, it's just something I thought of when I was bored, y'know one 'a' those things where ya' jump up and say somethin' outta nowhere about your idea, and no one knows what yer talkin' about? Well....it's funny, please r/r =^_^=


  
  
Don't _even_ assume I tried to stay in character, it'd be pathetic.  
  
Yaoi implications, if you don't know what yaoi is...then you're mentally ill and therefore  
should not read this fic, for reasons that may make you sane again...  
  
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One day while Farfie was torturing some random church-goers, a little girl dropped her Barbie as   
she ran screaming in the other direction.  
  
'Hm...What's this?' thought farfie as he picked up the young girl's doll.  
  
He sat, while sitting, he began to poking and prodding at the doll. Noting it was an inatimate  
abject, he looked at it, froze, then carelessly threw it over his head and left.  
  
After he had chased down some people yelling his Xena like war cry and attempting to stab them  
with his preety knife-thing, he found himself back where he had sat, poking and prodding at the  
doll, and there it lay.  
  
"Gah! It's you again," he said aloud.   
  
Barbie smiled as if to say, "Don't you just love how this blue cardigen compliments my   
eyes?"  
  
And it suddenly occured to him; No, he didn't. So he ripped off her baby blue cardigen and ate it.  
Leaving again, terrorizing people for one reason or another, but he was now hungry, so he began   
harrassing people with food, or people with money that could buy him food, or that he could mug,  
or just poor people with food stamps. (Like me).  
  
And, as before, he found himself back at square one, but at least his mind wasn't filling  
with thoughts of that damned cardigen sweater...he taught it a lesson...God'll be cryin' for   
months!  
  
"It's that damned doll!"thought Farfie,"I'll bet it's after me 'cause it knows I like to hurt  
God. Or maybe it likes to hurt god too, and just seeks my guidance!" He grinned menacingly,"Yes,  
that must be it!"  
  
Grabbing the doll he began his journey home, killing all that lay in his path.   
  
"Farfie's home," Nagi said in mid-sentance of some reading material he was...reading.  
  
Farfie smirked sadistically,"Look what I found Nagi! Her name is Patricia, and she likes  
to hurt God with me!"  
  
Farfie sat down next to Nagi showing off his new found friend, just as Crawford entered the room.  
  
"I can't believe this, Farfarello, what _are_ you doing with that Barbie doll?" he questioned  
as if Farfie was on trial.  
  
"Her _name_ is Patricia,and she likes to hurt God with me!"  
  
"Riii~iiight..." replied Crawford, then under his breath,"That moron."  
  
"At least he's occupied," said a hopeful Nagi pointing to the young Irishamn at his left  
who was moving 'Patricia's' arms and legs, and talking to her, as she moved chopily around the  
glass-centered coffee table.  
  
"What's Farfie up to?" asked Schulderig as he yawned and walked into the living room.  
"...and _why_ is he playing with Barbie?"  
  
"PATRICIA!" shouted back an irritated Farf-farf.  
  
"Whatever..."  
  
"Because he thinks she likes to hurt God with him," responded Nagi.  
  
"She _does_,"   
  
"Will somebody _please_ get him back to notmal?"  
  
"Why don't _you_ Schulderig? He's your lover,"  
  
"So what if he is?"   
  
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Argue, argue, argue...  
  
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"PATRICIA!"  
  
"Will you all _please_ stop it?"  
  
"Shove it, Nagi!"  
  
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And so and so forth, until later that...week.  
  
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"Bwahahaha I'm gunna kill you, and then I'm gunna play with Patricia!" Farfie yelled at Kenken  
as het seated Patricia on a safe rafter spot above him.," Now, pay attention Patricia, this is  
how it's done," he said  
  
Ken ken turned to Aya and whispered," He really is a piece of work isn't he?"   
  
Aya nodded, staisfyed with the response, Ken ken turned his attention back to Farfie, "You're  
not going to kill _me_, because I have the power of Aya's kowai orange sweater, and so nothing  
can hurt me!"  
  
"I heard that!"  
  
Ken ken rolled his eyes," That's only because I said it directly _to_ you!"  
  
Farfie blinked twice replying with a kawaii blank stare,"So...how does it work?"  
  
"Well...First you steal your lover's- err - I mean, "friend's" sweater, and then you tie  
it around your weist, and you're invincible!"  
  
Learning this, Farfie then scurried off after SchuSchu...  
  
"Ha ha! While he's gone we can hit him where he lives!"  
  
"His house?"  
  
"Exactly!"  
  
And so they tortured poor Patricia to ...death..., and ran off making fun of Farfie   
having a Barbie...and had some fun doing other things...as well...  
  
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"I'm baaa~aaack, Schu-honey gave me his green coat thingy!" Farfie entered smiling,  
and then saw his beloved Patricia, dead [Well...as close to dead as a Barbie doll gets] upon the  
floor.  
  
"OH NO! My darling Patricia! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WHat have they _done_ to you?"  
He yelled hugging th debri formerly known as Patricia, or "Housewife cardigan sweater Barbie".  
  
Schulderig quickly followed Farfie's angsty cries to the scene.  
  
"What is it Farfie?"  
  
Farfie turned to him with tears in his eyes," Look what they've done, LOOOOOOOOOK!!!:  
He burst into another fit of tears. Schulderig held him taking this oppurtunity to his advantage  
considering this probably wouldn't occur ever again. "Shhh, don't worry Farfie, SchuSchu will  
make it aaa~aaall better, so don't cry," He smiled.  
  
And so they left the cobwebbed filled loft (that they had magically appeared in out of  
nowhere earlier in the story, and if you don't remember, you obviously weren't paying attention,  
and need to be shot, so don't _even_ bother looking back into the story... because we will get you,  
bwahahahahahaha!!!) abd went home to make chocolate sundaes and watch Road Trip, and write Fanfics...  
Oh wait... that was my night... all except for the sundae part, that was all them...  
  
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DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN ANY...* DEEP BREATH* CHURCH-GOERS, LITTLE GIRLS, BARBIES, FARFIES   
(DAMN...), SCHUSCHUS (DOUBLE DAMN), KEN KENS...ETC, MONEY, FOOD, GLASS CENTERED COFFEE TABLES, THE  
NAME PATRICIA, SCHUSCHU'S GREEN COAT THINGY, ROAD TRIP, OR CHOCOLATE SUNDAES. 


End file.
